A 41-year-old woman who became a ‘cougar’ because men her age just aren’t interested in her anymore has revealed that her sex life is so good she’s not even sure she would want to go back to dating guys in their 40s.
Melanie Hamlett, a
‘I didn’t set out to be a “cougar,” but it seems like Tinder is chock-full of lonely cubs,’ she wrote. ‘I have never had this much sex—let alone good sex—in my life.’
Candid: Melanie Hamlett, a 41-year-old writer living in Los Angeles, has opened up about being a ‘cougar’ in her latest essay
Change of heart: She explained that men her own age stopped showing interest in her, so she changed her age minimum on Tinder to 25 and the date offers started rolling in
The writer, who said she has the ‘sex drive of a teenage boy,’ pointed out that there are plenty of benefits of dating men who are in their 20s and 30s.
‘These younger guys are more progressive, have less emotional baggage, and love dating a confident woman who knows what she wants and tells them what to do,’ she explained. I’ve never felt so sexy and attractive.’
Melania recalled being worried that she would ‘suddenly become invisible to men’ when she turned 40, and she admitted that in some ways that was true.
‘If my Tinder matches are any indication, that fear isn’t totally unfounded: Dudes my own age just aren’t interested anymore,’ she said.
She eventually became so frustrated with her ‘desolate Tinder inbox’ that she decided to change the age minimum on the app to 25—and that’s when the date offers came rolling in.
Melania said the most surprising thing about men who are nearly half her age is the fact that they treat her much better than her male peers ever had.
New world: Melanie said there are plenty of men in their 20s and 30 who are excited to date her, and she has ‘never had this much sex’ in her life
Young at heart: As an avid climber and traveler, she said men her own age—and even those who are 10 years younger—are ‘too old’ to keep up with her
She credits the difference to younger guys being ‘more feminist and sex positive’ than the men in her generation.
In her essay, she recounted the how the 27-year-old French man she matched with on Tinder recently cooked her an elaborate dinner with a special sauce he named after her, even though they agreed that their relationship would only be sexual in nature.
At this point, she isn’t even sure she would want to be with a man in his 40s.
As an avid climber and traveler, she said men her own age—and even those who are 10 years younger—are ‘too old’ to keep up with her.
Melanie’s last boyfriend was nine years her junior, and she said being in a relationship with him made her realize that she shouldn’t worry about being labeled a cougar for dating younger guys.
‘I’ve decided to embrace being a cougar. It’s the best decision I’ve ever made and all it took was letting go of my own internalized misogyny,’ she wrote. ‘I highly recommend it.’